Friday, July 12, 2002

I have completely sold out. I am now less of a person. I'm so embarrassed.

Yesterday I had to get a cellphone for work. Thanks to Sprint PCS, I have 4000 minutes a month to blow on that crappy little device better known as a leash.

I hate cellphones mostly because they are phones. I have a telephone at my house. Do I use it? Not unless absolutely necessary. Why not? I just don't dig mindless chit-chat. Sure, if it is someone who I have not seen in ages and we are catching up on our lives, yeah, that is nice. When someone has something important to say -- i.e. birth of a child (Congrats, Seth & Marlo! You could have called me, you know!), death of a family member (sympathies to the Cunninghams), audition results (go Manda!), or anything else newsworthy... I'm all about that. I guess since I don't like talking about myself (why do I blog then? I don't know.), unless you have something to say yourself, I don't see the point in phonecalls. But that's me.

I think I am most upset because I am going to be that person. You know who I am talking about. The person in line at the deli who answers a call pausing every couple seconds to amend their order. I do not want to be, but the point of the cellphone is so that my boss can reach me whenever he wants.

Last weekend at the airport, I had to listen to this woman blab on and on with the person who had apparently just dropped her off there. Most people don't yell into their home telephones, why do they feel compelled to do so on a mobile? So it was completely distracting for those of us who were trying to read or think or whatever people do while waiting for departure.

I admit it; I had another cellphone before this one. However it stayed in my glovebox only to be used in emergencies. I never even had a clue what the number to it was. This was good cellphone useage to me. Emergencies. Good plan.

At least I'm not the only one who feels this way:

• "I hate cell phones. I hate them like I hate the guy in the log truck who doesn't pull into the left lane so I can merge. I hate them like that ten-minute commercial span between 9:25 and 9:35 during my favorite television program. I hate cellular telephones like I hate mothers who slap their children at K-Mart. Am I making myself clear? I HATE CELL PHONES."
~ Carter Online

• "It is my opinion that 99% of cell phone usage has nothing to do with emergencies, or any other functional purpose whatsoever. Rather, the cell phone becomes an excuse to discuss the very personal details of one’s life in the immediate proximity of complete strangers, and to do so loudly." ~ Maurice Marshfield

• "There you are in a movie theatre, you are watching a movie that you have waited months for and what happens? Some guy gets a call on his cell phone and begins to have a conversation about the movie that you're trying to watch. This is what I call justifiable homocide."
~ Vikar's Rant

• "I don't want to stand in line behind you at the supermarket, listening to how you couldn't find your favorite kind of ice cream. I don't want people walking around with phone holsters, ready to draw at any time." ~ Chris Jungle - I guess I now need to live in fear of becoming a victim of one of these pranks.


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